Discussion Post - #5: Authors Who Changed Me

Books That Changed You

I've been wanting to do a huge, fangirlish (but also serious) post on this subject for awhile.  I've alluded to some of these books and authors before, be it in guest posts, Top Ten Tuesdays, or just in book-ish discussions with blogging friends and "IRL" friends.  But the truth of the matter is, for those incredibly rare, special books that changed the way I read books (as Suz would say), introduced me to a new genre, strengthened a friendship, or just plain changed ME....there is never enough that can be said.  I can't think a few authors enough for putting their books out into the world.  Without them, I wouldn't have had the courage to write, to reach out with my words, and to become the (rather awesome) person that I am.  So...here's to you!  

After I gush about a few authors and books that had a big impact on me, hit the comments and let me know what ones did that for you.  What books moved you?  What books made you cry and mourn?  What authors or books have YOU never been able to forget?  What authors would YOU say "thank you" to?

{Note: At the top of my blog on my navigation bar is now a link...for YOU to send in a suggestion of any topic you'd like to see a future discussion post here cover!  It's super easy and I'd LOVE to know what my readers would like to discuss, or see what questions - literature or blog-related - you'd like me to answer!}

V.C. Andrews

Y'all can't see me right now, but I'm smiling.  Because of V.C. Andrews, I discovered: keyhole covers, family secrets, modern day Gothic novels, ancestral mansions with hidden secrets, swoon-worthy boys, guilty pleasure books, evil grandmothers, and females who NEVER GAVE UP.  Because of V.C. Andrews, I joined my first ever online roleplay and tried my hand at writing for the first time in a few years.  Because of V.C. Andrews, I stepped outside my comfort zone, made amazing memories with great people, and met my best friend, Julie.  Because of V.C. Andrews books...I learned to dream.

It's been many years since I read many VCA books.  The original ones - the ones written by her before she died - as well as a few of the ones that her ghostwriter wrote still have a place on my bookshelf together.  The ghostwriter has gone WAY downhill in the last ten years or so...it's been that long since I read anything new he published under her name.  But I have LOTS of memories of debating the classic VCA novels, writing, laughing, and falling for these books.  If you're looking to EVER read anything by VCA, please start with FLOWERS IN THE ATTIC. Go in with an open heart and I think you'll fall for the characters, too.  Her books are still so polarizing and lasting.  

Suggested read: Flowers in the Attic. 

Anne Bishop

Oh, what to say about Anne Bishop that I haven't said here several times already?  My AP English teacher in my senior year of high school recced her books to me, and yet it wasn't until about three years later that I picked up the first one, because one of my best friends was just finishing the trilogy.  I met her and another amazing online friend (see the paragraph on Robert Jordan for more about them) that year and all it took was Julie's recommendation that I try this series - a trilogy at that point.  

I did.  And I was amazed.  Here was a dark fantasy unlike ANYTHING I'd ever read.  These books are intense, to the point that I constantly felt breathless and on the edge of my seat.  The characters are so REAL.  You can't help but adore them - and hate the ones you're supposed to hate.  Characters like Daemon, Lucivar, Saetan, and Janelle are STILL somewhere in the back of my mind; along the way of reading the trilogy, I laughed with them and at them, sobbed for them, feared for them, and ultimately, fell in love with all of them in some ways.  

Recently, Bishop published the ninth book in her series - maybe the final book in her series - and I only read part of it.  She took the story in a direction that, while I knew it HAD to happen, did not want to see or experience.  And that's her choice; she is, after all, the author.  But I want to keep the memory of my beloved characters intact, so I'm holding off on continuing with the series for now.

But, oh.  Daemon.  Daemon Sadi.  The first alpha male I ever read about, and a DIFFERENT sort of alpha male.  Quietly dangerous, sensual to the point of being overwhelmingly so, loyal, fierce, caring, and all around amazing.  The love he shares with Janelle and with his family is truly inspiring.  To this day I can open to any point at random in the trilogy and end up laughing or crying. 

Suggested read: Daughter of the Blood.  

Jodi Picoult.

I honestly don't know how to describe my love for Jodi's books.  Jodi Picoult has the rare, amazing ability to write characters that feel so REAL, characters that linger with you long after you turn the final page of whichever book of hers you happen to be reading.   Her characters get inside your head, and don't leave you alone - not while you're reading their story, and not after.  It's been years since I read a few of her books that I consider favorites and from time to time, I STILL think about this book or that one, or certain amazing characters.  

Jodi Picoult takes you on a journey with each book of hers.  And what I like best is that she makes you THINK.  She isn't afraid to tackle tough, ugly, hard subjects and make you wonder: how do I feel about this?  She pulls at your heart and leaves you trying to put yourself back together.  And I adore her for that.  

Suggested read: Mercy.  

Suzanne Collins.   

I could tell you about my experience reading - laughing, crying, weeping - The Hunger Games.  I could tell you about Gale - male, snarly, Gale.  I could tell you about Finnick - tortured, beautiful Finnick.  I could tell you about Gale/Katniss.  About stalking these books until I had all three.  About finishing Mockingjay and being ripped apart, turned inside out, and wondering if I would ever heal.  I could tell you about writing for these characters.  

But I think I'll let this post that I wrote last year speak for itself.  

Suggsted read: Seriously?  The entire trilogy!

Terry Brooks

I was 15 years old when I read my first Brooks book.  To be honest, Terry Brooks was one of the VERY FIRST sci-fi/fantasy authors I ever read.  I was at Wal-Mart and wandered over to that section, where I'd never really been before.  I was fresh out of young adult - Sweet Valley University and such - and wanting something different.  Wal-Mart had First King of Shannara on the shelf; the word "Druids" jumped out and me and I bought it.  I ended up writing a paper on it for English later that year, and from then on, I spent about a year reading everything by Brooks I could get my hands on.

In recent years I've fallen quite a few series behind, but I still have a soft spot for Brooks.  I spent many a lunch hour with my nose buried in one of his books. 

Suggested read:  The Sword of Shannara.

Robert Jordan.

Two of my closest friends and I read this series together; for Jamilla and I, it was a first read, and for Julie, it was a re-read.  We had many long discussions about what this prophecy meant, how much we loved that character (MAT CAUTHON, yo!), and where we thought the next book would take the series.  The Wheel of Time series was my, to date, biggest and most heart-wrenching venture into epic fantasy.  It brought me closer to two friends.  It provided hours of escape, thought, and imagining.  Jordan's words brought smiles to my lips and tears to my eyes.  I felt like I KNEW his characters through and through.  I met Aviendha, one of my all time favorite female characters.

When Robert Jordan died after a long illness, I cried for quite some time.  He is the only author whose death I've truly mourned.   I haven't read a WOT book since he passed.  A ghostwriter is finishing the series in Jordan's memory, and I am very excited to one day return to the books and the world I love. 

Suggested read: The Eye of the World.  

Stephen King.  

In the summer of my sophomore year of  high school, one of my then-best friends moved away, but not before adamantly telling me to read Stephen King's Dark Tower series.  I'd read a few of King's books and even loved several - IT, The Eyes of the Dragon, and so forth.  But for some reason, I put off reading the Dark Tower series until around my senior year.  My friend and I lost touch, but every once in awhile I'd see a SK book and think of him.  During one library visit, I finally checked out the first Tower book, The Gunslinger...and I fell HARD.  It was so different from anything else I'd read by King.  I fell for gritty and hard Roland, brave Jake, and the AMAZING Eddie Dean.

I followed the series for a few years, catching up on the books, then waiting impatiently for the final three to be released.  I have a LOT of mixed feelings about the series, and I tell people now to only read the first four books, because the last three just hurt TOO much.  I have a great deal of issues with the series but I've had to accept that it's the author's story to write, and not mine.  But I am SO glad I read these books, because after I finished the Tower series, I started reading more books outside of my comfort zone, and I found other authors and worlds to visit and love. 

Suggested reads: The Talisman | The Gunslinger | It



That's it for me this week.  Your turn!  What books have changed YOU?  Made you laugh until your stomach hurt, or cry until you had no tears left?  Let me know in the comments!  And if you've read and loved any books by these authors...let me know!  

And don't forget to click the "Submit A Discussion Question" link at the top of my navigation bar! 

Follow Friday - #13 + Book Blogger Hop - #11

{ ++ } Follow Me Friday, aka "Follow My Book Blog" is probably the coolest meme I've come across in awhile.  It's hosted over at Parajunkee's View and also now at Alison Can Read, and us amazing book-a-holics get the chance to answer a reading-related question, as well as make new friends over the weekend.  It's a great way to kick off said weekend, and a really fun and easy way of stealing our way into the hearts of fellow book blogger's.

{ ++ } Each week, Rachel features one lucky blogger and her feature is Bonnie at Hands and Home.  Alison also features a blogger, and hers is Me, My Shelf, and I.  Everyone please head on over to those blogs, follow, and show them some love!  It's a huge honor (I think!) to be featured.

Q. Talk about the book that most changed or influenced your life (was it a book that turned you from an average to avid reader, did it help you deal with a particularly difficult situation, does it bring you comfort every time you read it?)

{ ++ } What a great question!  There have been several books over the years that launched my love of reading into a new genre, or ramped it up to a fever pitch.   Some authors, whether they will ever know it or not, have deeply changed the way I read books, or thought about my own writing style, and inspired me to dig deeper for my own creativity.

Books/series that totally swept me off my feet as a pre-teen: Sweet Valley High (and later, University and Senior Year), The Baby-Sitter's Club, and R.L. Stine's Fear Street series.  

Later in life: V.C. Andrews.  Patrick Rothfuss.  Beverly Lewis.  Janette Oke.  J.R. Ward.  J.K. Rowling.

And the the authors that, with their books and their writing, literally changed something about me, the way I read books, and the wy I think about good books: Jodi Picoult.  Robert Jordan.  Anne Bishop. (I can pick up Bishop's Black Jewels trilogy, and I'm home.  I start crying at the touching parts.  I laugh and laugh at the hilarious parts.  It's a little cheesy at times, but it made sense to me.  The alpha males were fucking awesome.  They bled over a little into my writing - I've since learned how to write kick-ass alpha males.  And I adored the relationships and the plot.  The trilogy will forever hold a special place in my heart.)

{ ++ } What about y'all?

{ ++ } Hosted by Jennifer at Crazy-for-Books, what better way to allow us book bloggers to mix and mingle than a bit of a reading-related social?  Every week she hosts this event, where we can throw our names in the hat so to speak, and hopefully end up with a few new friends who share our interests and our love (and in my case, obsession) of books.  It's also a party and it's all in fun!

Q: What is the one ARC you would love to get your hands on right now?

{ ++ } Just one?  Oh alright!  Probably Kelley Armstrong's The Calling...because um, hello, cliffhanger much?!  I so need to know what happens to these characters!  Um, wait, can I change my answer?  Maybe the third (untitled) book in Pat Rothfuss's The Kingkiller Chronicles trilogy.  BECAUSE UM.  KVOTHE.  AND GAH.  I HAVE to know how it all ends.  

{ ++ } I want to wish everyone a VERY awesome weekend.  I also want to say a big, happy hello to my new followers.  I am off to do some hoppin' and hopefully will see a few familiar and a few new faces around here soon.  : )  Peace out. 

Review: Midnight Whispers

Midnight Whispers / V.C. Andrews
Published: 1992 (Pocket Books)

Pages: 440 pages

Originally read: 2001

Re-read: July 4 2011 - July 7 2011

Happy and innocent, Dawn's daughter Christie has grown up in the safest, most loving of homes...

Yet Christie can't help feeling as if a dark cloud hovers over Cutler's Cove...a cloud whose origins lie in her family's troubled history, and the many questions no one, not even Dawn, will answer. Only one person can always chase away her blues: Gavin, Daddy Jimmy's young and handsome stepbrother.

Then, in one harsh night, Christie's world is changed forever. She is shocked to discover her Uncle Philip's unbrotherly love for her mother but even worse is the way he now looks at Christie, his eyes bright with tortured passion. Fleeing to New York City, she finds her real father...a pathetic, helpless has-been.

Desperate and heartbroken, she turns to Gavin, who travels with her to The Meadows, the plantation where Christie was born. In Gavin's arms, in the first, tender moments of true love, Christie finds a refuge from her painful memories. But The Meadows is blighted by its own dark secrets — and all too soon Christie is torn from Gavin's embrace. Now as black storms of evil gather around her, Christie must struggle to break the cruel bonds of the past...to defy the curse that has haunted Cutler's Cove for generations....

The long story short: After her parent’s deaths and her uncle Philip’s betrayal, protagonist Christie Longchamp runs to the one place she thinks she might be safe.  Hiding on the run-down plantation where she was born, I expected Christie to mature; however, sheltered to the point of naiveté by her mother, Christie makes only irresponsible decisions.  A weak narrator to start, I never really felt connected to Christie despite her tragedies and triumphs. 

Final rating: 2 1/2 of 5 stars

_______

(Full disclosure: there are a few spoilers in this review.  I normally try not to touch on anything the back of the book does not reveal but this book was very hard for me to read and to finish and due to some of the subject matter, I'm going a little more in depth than I normally would.)

After the untimely death of her parent’s, Christie Longchamp is thrust into a world she does not recognize.  (Truthfully, I shed more tears over Dawn and Jimmy’s deaths than I did for Christie over the course of her story.)  Following the “formula” V.C. Andrews tentatively established, and her ghostwriter capitalized on, Midnight Whispers follows the next generation of the Cutler family – Christie, and through her eyes, her younger brother Jefferson, and her step-father’s younger half-brother, whom Christie has a strong connection with, one that often amazes and confuses her.  After her Uncle Philip and his family move in to take over guardianship of Christie and Jefferson, Christie sees firsthand Philip’s strange behavior…behavior Dawn blindly never truly warned Christie about. 

I think this was one of my absolute biggest peeves in this book, and in this series.  As a mother, Dawn should have taken steps to either get Philip the help he needed, or to keep her daughter away from him.  Instead, it seems she thought she would always be there to protect her innocent daughter – until she wasn’t.

One night strips the last of Christie’s innocence, and she and her brother run away – first to one location, then another, finally calling on Gavin to help whisk them away, to a place where they can hide from reality instead of face it.  This was maybe the part I found the least believable.  Christie, at this point, has been sexually assaulted…yet less than a week later, she throws herself fully into the romantic relationship she hasn’t thus far indulged in with Gavin.   The first time I read this book that didn’t strike me as odd; this time, as an adult, I couldn’t wrap my head around her actions.  For me, Christie jumping into a relationship with Gavin almost cheapened what might otherwise have been a very touching young love.

I have a lot of issues with this book.  Andrew Neiderman (writing as V.C. Andrews) crossed a line when he took Philip’s character in the direction he did.  Before, I had some sympathy for Philip; after, I can understand why Christie ran away from him, in some ways.  The author took his character beyond redemption, which pains me, because I've written for Philip before in VCA themed roleplays.  I also absolutely loathed Fern’s character in this book.  I thought it was utterly a waste of pages, bringing her in at all, much less for the 100+ pages she was in the book.  Her character was given love and chance after chance at redemption, but all she was interested in throughout the this book and the previous one, was telling everyone how bad her life had been.

Overall, I disliked this book.  I thought a few times about not finishing it, but to respect my series re-read, I pushed through.  I did want Christie and Jefferson to find happiness, and was somewhat satisfied with how the story ended, but I felt Midnight Whispers was by far the weakest book in the series (I refuse to re-read the prequel so I won’t/can’t comment on it) and it was not in any way the story I imagined for Dawn’s daughter.

Top Ten Tuesday - #3

++ } Hosted by the girls over at The Broke and the Bookish, this meme features a different theme every week, and hey, it's Tuesday - we've got the rest of the week ahead of us.  We all need a little fun, and who doesn't love the challenge of ranking their top 10 anything...especially when it comes to books?!

{ ++ } This week's Top 10 is: Top Ten Authors I Would Die to Meet.  (Authors can be alive or deceased.)  And wow, what a question this is!  There is no way I can actually rank these authors, since I would pretty much be doing the Wayne's World "I'm not worthy!" thing...and praying for one of the following authors to say, a la Steven Tyler, "you're worthy, you're worthy...get up!"  Haha!

{ 1 } Jodi Picoult.  She's fabulous.  No, really.  She writes these amazing books that tackle hard to read about subjects.  She just...gets a good grip on your heart and doesn't let go.  Plus...she seems really amazing!

{ 2 } Patrick Rothfuss.  Because he's one of the most awesome fantasy writers I've ever encountered (well not really or, well, see the above "I'm not worthy" comment).  He writes a kick ass, funny-as-hell blog where he actually interacts with his fans.  How cool is that?!

{ 3 } Libba Bray.  Wow, do I need to explain?  I'm a HUGE fan of her Gemma Doyle trilogy.  I love her writing style and am in fact quite envious of her story-telling abilities.  : D

{ 4 } Kelley Armstrong.  Because, well.  She's just TOO awesome!  She gave us Elena/Clay.  *bows down*  I adore her writing style, and how real her characters seem!

{ 5 } Terry Brooks.  Oh wow.  Wow.  One of the first sci-fi/fantasy authors I read.  I remember coming across one of his books at Wal-Mart and going, "hmm.  I'll try it."  Couple months later I was writing a report about the book and flailing over him from then on!

{ 6 } Anne Bishop.  Um.  Yeah.  If you know me at all you know Anne Bishop's Black Jewels trilogy still makes my knees weak, five years after I first read it.  Cause, um...Daemon Sadi?  Yes please.  Plus she just has a WAY with her storytelling!

{ 7 } Suzanne Collins.  The author of The Hunger Games and my intense, never ending, always flail-y love for Finnick Odair and Peeta Mellark.  : )  I could try to accurately express my admiration of her but I'd start rambling and shame myself.  ; )

 { 8 } Diana Gabaldon.  Author of the fantastic, fabulous, and phenomenal Outlander series, or aka one of the series guaranteed to make me flail continuously the entire time I'm reading one of her books.  : D  Plus...Jamie/Claire!  One of my book OTP's!

{ 9 } J. K. Rowling.   : ) : ) : )

Do I have to say anything?  Harry.  Ron.  Hermione.  Ron/Hermione.  Harry/Ginny.  Ron/Hermione.  :D

Also?  I cry every time I see a trailer for any of the movies.  I will watch Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone every time it is on. 

{ 10 }V. C. Andrews.  Full disclosure:  I haven't read a V.C. Andrews (ghostwritten by Andrew Neiderman) since 2004.  But I still get a little swoon-y over Flowers in the Attic and the subsequesent Dollanganger series, and the stand-alone novel, My Sweet Audrina.  If this amazing lady was still alive, I would move heaven and earth to meet her.  I've laughed, cried, and been outraged and heart-broken and so happy reading her books.  Somewhere deep in my heart, V.C. Andrews and her books kick-started my mature love of reading and writing.  :  )



{ ++ } I'm excited to see everyone else's lists!  And...just because an author isn't on here doesn't mean there aren't many many more I'd shame myself to meet.  ; )  Everyone have a great Tuesday!

Review: Twilight's Child

Twilight's Child / V.C. Andrews

Published: 1992 (Pocket Books)

Pages: 410

Originally read: 2000

Re-read: June 28 2011 - July 3 2011

As Mrs. James Gary Longchamp, Dawn is blissfully happy. But a legacy of deceit and betrayal still haunts her...

At last Dawn can create a haven of warmth and love for her beautiful baby girl, Christie, and her darling Jimmy. Dawn is a huge success as the new owner of the Cutler's Cove hotel...and soon she and Jimmy will be blessed with a child of their own.

Yet Dawn cannot quell her forebodings of evil. She can sense Grandmother Cutler's presence everywhere...can feel her bitter hatred as if the old lady plotted her vengeance from the grave. When Dawn discovers that her brother, Philip, still clings to his mad, shameful passion for her, she is heartstricken. Her spiteful, jealous sister, Clara, is far easier to ignore...until the day Clara's childish rage explodes into violence, destroying Dawn's most cherished, precious dream.

Then Christie's father, debonair singing star Michael Sutton, returns. Now, as the heartaches and scandals of the past threaten to engulf her, Dawn must fight for her steadfast Jimmy...for only with Jimmy's love can she find the rainbow at the end of the storm. 

The long story short:  Married to her sweetheart, Dawn Cutler Longchamp struggles to acclimate to life as the new owner of the Cutler's Cove hotel.  Dawn's growing pains as a business owner and as a young wife and mother felt realistic and believable; unfortunately, the side arcs of the return of Christie's father and Dawn's brother, Philip's unwavering passion for her did not.  At time the author seemed as if he was reaching for enough material to fill the pages of a book that could have easily been shortened by about 100 pages and still have told the same story.  



Final rating: 3 of 5 stars

_______

This book started off with Dawn engaging in a brief but poignant legal battle to reclaim her infant daughter, whom Grandmother Cutler had secretly arranged for a childless couple to adopt, proving to Dawn that although she is dead, her grandmother’s machinations are not yet finished.  Returning to Cutler's Cove with her young child, Dawn is thrown headlong into a new world - that of owner of her family's business.  The truth of her parentage has been revealed and Dawn struggles with it - she now understands much more, and also, much less about the Cutler's and their history - and herself.  Her search for the truth, and for self-awareness resonated with me. 

As the various skeletons in the closet plague Dawn's new life, the calm amidst the storm is her relationship with Jimmy Longchamp.  One of the best things about the series, for me, was their unorthodox courtship and subsequent marriage.  I was not a fan of the lack of transition in the first book, from their belief they were siblings, to, after finding out they weren’t, giving in to so-called long buried romantic yearnings, but there is something undeniably heart-warming about them, for me.  Jimmy puts up with a hell of a lot - clearly, he adores Dawn, but what worked for me was that he let her know what he thought.  He wasn't a mindless robot like so many of the author's latter male characters became.  He and Dawn communicated and made decisions together.  Their love felt real - I felt like I was there with them, as they learned how to be a husband and wife. 

Sadly, another love was that of Philip for Dawn.  Having never let go of his romantic yearnings for his half-sister, Philip wavers between brotherly devotion and a lover's passion in this novel.  At times, even though I knew what would happen, I hoped he had changed.  But in the end the reader can tell he still harbors his mad hopes that he and Dawn will be lovers.  What bothered me most about this is that Dawn knew, Jimmy knew even if he didn't say, even selfish Clara Sue knew, and yet...no one addressed the issue.  Everyone just stuck their heads in the sand and hoped Philip marrying (his wife is a plain girl, easily molded in his eyes, into a substitute for Dawn) would make the problem go away. 

My biggest complaint with the series to date is the Cutler family's "if I don't think about it, it isn't happening," attitude.  Everyone, even Dawn, is guilty of this from time to time.  Through the first three books this was a recurring theme, one that I never understood. 

I also was not a fan of the passage of time in this novel.  Maybe it's because I am used to reading books where events occur more in "real time," but when time passed in great leaps and bounds in this book, it felt awkward and as if I was missing important things.  It's hard to believe that six years passes in this novel, a book that feels more like a bunch of haphazardly thrown together little arcs than a cohesive novel. 

A lot happened that I didn't like, luckily, I love Dawn Cutler Longchamp enough to overlook most of that.  She makes some bad choices in this book, but continues to grow up and mature.  At the end of the day, she is a character with heart, a character who feels believable and sympathetic, except when Neiderman, writing as V.C. Andrews delves a little too far into his attempt at writing for a female (words like "bosom" are thrown around a little too frequently, and at times Dawn's "voice" is a little hysterical.)

Review: Secrets of the Morning

Secrets of the Morning / V.C. Andrews

Published: 1991 (Pocket Books)

Pages:405

Originally read: 2000

Re-read: June 26 2011 - June 28 2011

Shadowed by her tortured past, Dawn has a bright new life of glimmering hopes...

Dawn can hardly believe she's a student at one of New York City's best music schools. Now her most precious wish, to become a singer, can come true. But Dawn still dreams about Jimmy, her strong, intense boyfriend, and the love and anguished secrets they share.

Then Michael Sutton arrives, a new teacher at the school, a singing star and the most wonderful looking man Dawn has ever seen. Together they create a world of feeling Dawn has never known. In his embrace Dawn awakens to disturbing, unfamiliar desires, and Michael's promises offer a vision of music and romance forever...until he disappears.

Dazed by his cruelty, alone with the bitter fruit of his betrayal, Dawn becomes, once again, a victim of her grandmothers twisted schemes. Desolate, she clings to the tender hope that Jimmy will return and renew with her their deepest hearts' dream...

_______

The long story short:  The long story short: Reading this book was both painful and hopeful - painful because Dawn's naivete shone through clearly as debonair Michael Sutton seduces her, among the bright city lights.  And hopeful, because through her own mistakes, Dawn learns to believe in herself.  And some of her mistakes are huge.  But some comes out of it more determined than ever to live her own life.  I could identify with her heartache and I cheered for her in the end.  The book was not without its flaws but overall I enjoyed it.

Final Rating: 3 of 5 stars

_______

Attending a prestigous school for the performing arts in New York, Dawn Cutler finally has a chance to realize her dreams.  Her family members - all of whom are either distant or spiteful - no longer have the chance to bring her down, as her natural talent flourishes, and she grows more confident and comfortable in her life training to be a singer.  Then seductive and debonair Michael Sutton builds her up only to destroy her, leaving her once again a pawn in her Grandmother's machinations.  

I had a lot of issues with this book.  Although I have had my heart broken - and badly - when I was a little younger and in a relationship where I was blind to the other person's flaws (and to mine!) and I can sympathize with Dawn, I found it difficult to believe that she so readily believed Michael Sutton's lies.  He was one of the slimiest, greasiest characters I've ever read about, and with every false promise he made to Dawn, I wasn't sure what I wanted to do more - shake her, or slap him.  Starved for love, she never questioned his intentions, and I wished, as I turned the pages, that somehow the story I remembered would turn out differently.  But Michael's abandonment of Dawn hurt just as much this time, perhaps because (for some crazy reason) I actually adore her.

Watching Dawn flounder as Grandmother Cutler once again steps in to arrange the solution she has deemed best, my heart hurt for Dawn.  Her family, we find out later, knows of her situation, and does nothing to help her.  Dawn is sent to stay with her great-aunts, one of whom is simple, the other who is a religious fanatic, and cruel.  Dawn definitely pays for her misplaced faith under great aunt Emily, who works her to the bone and endlessly lectures her about what a sinner she is.  When Dawn finally gets to leave, I practically clapped.

I'm a little torn on this book.  I loved some parts.  I loved that despite everything she puts him through, Jimmy is still there for Dawn.  She makes some HUGE mistakes, and he never wavers in his love for and his devotion to her.  Some would call that blind, but I always saw him as choosing to rise above it all and move on from the past and the bad decisions.  I didn't like that Dawn, at times, tended to depend on Jimmy too much, and I feel like she took for granted that he would always be there for her.  She had to grow up a lot in this book, and when I get to my re-read of the next book, I hope to see that she realizes how amazing Jimmy is to love her like he does.

I was not fond of the twist at the end of the book.  I thought it was a little too easy, and while it explained a lot from the current and previous book, I guess I will always wish Andrew Neiderman (writing as V.C. Andrews) had taken a different route.  But overall this book was emotional and enjoyable, though somewhat bittersweet, as Dawn's rags-to-riches story takes on several new levels, and new turns in the road.  The book ends on an extremely hopeful note though, with Dawn and Jimmy - quite literally - headed toward their future, together.

Review: Dawn

Dawn

Pages: 415

Published: Pocket Books

The author: V.C. Andrews

Originally read: 2000

Re-Read: 2011

Momma once told me that she and Daddy named me Dawn because I was born at the break of day.  That was the first of a thousand lies Momma and Daddy would tell me and my brother, Jimmy.  Of course we wouldn't know they were lies, not for a long time, not until the day they came to take us away... - Prologue.

In her fine new Virginia school Dawn Longchamp feels happy and safe.  But nothing is what it seems.  Now Dawn and her older brother Jimmy have a chance for a decent, respectable life, and Dawn's secret, precious hope to study singing can come true.  Philip Cutler, the handsomest boy in school, sets Dawn's heart on fire.  She is deeply devoted to her brooding brother, but with Philip, she imagines a lovely dream of romance.

Then Dawn's mother suddenly dies, and her entire world begins to crumble.  After a terrible new shock, she is thrust into a different family and an evil web of unspoken sins.  Her sweet innocence lost, humiliated and scorned, Dawn is desperate to find Jimmy again...and strip away the wicked lies that will change all their lives forever.

The long story short:  This story broke my heart the first time I read it, and that was no less true, over ten years later.  Dawn is a strong heroine, if somewhat naive, who weathers everything life throws at her with remarkable strength and courage.  Knowing what comes next provided some perspective on the tragedies of this book, but nevertheless I shed a few tears when I closed the book.

Final rating: 3 of 5 stars

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Okay, here we go.  Full disclosure:  I was fifteen years old when I first read this book.  I have written (roleplayed) for Dawn Cutler, and I have always had a soft spot for the character.  That said, I was utterly terrified to read this book.  It harkens back to my teenage days.  What if I hated it?  What if I didn't like Dawn anymore?  What if the book was trashy?  This book began the Cutler family series, and with it, the "V.C. Andrews formula" (tentatively began in her Casteel series) continued: the protagonist, usually a talented and pretty girl, finds out the family she believes to be hers really isn't, and her entire world crumbles.  In latter books, the formula grew tired and the ghost-writer for V.C. Andrews lost the earlier flair he had for staying true to her writing style and story-telling prowress.  (I eventually stopped reading her books about 5 or 6 years ago.)  But with Dawn, even this time around, I felt there was a little something special there.

Forced to work as a chamber maid in the Cutler's Cove hotel and live apart from her family, Dawn struggles to find even a single ally in the hotel and in her family.  Everywhere she turns, someone, it seems, is pushing her away, or denying their relationship to her, for their own reasons.  Each of them has a reason for resenting her return to them: her sister, Clara Sue feels she has always lived in the shadows of the sister who was kidnapped, the sister she was born to replace.  Philip cannot accept that he and Dawn are related and cannot be together.  Dawn reminds Laura Sue of her past transgressions.  Grandmother Cutler sees Dawn as a wild, untamed threat.   Dawn feels alone and betrayed without her brother and her sister.  She cannot understand why her Longchamp parents took her, and as she reaches out to unravel the mystery of her kidnapping, her relatives push her away lest she come too close to the truth several of them have spent years trying to hide.

I liked a lot about this book.  I liked that Dawn stuck to her beliefs and refused to let her grandmother make her change her name (to the one the Cutler's had originally given her.)  I liked that she was not afraid to believe in something good.  Yes, she was (and is even into later books) too sheltered and naive but she was a very interesting foil to her cruel sister.  I liked several of the supporting characters, especially Jimmy.  I loved his temper and his strength, and the he exhibited a wisdom a little beyond his years.

What I didn't like: Dawn's Cutler family was far too eager to ignore anything unpleasant.  Laura Sue, who claims to be too nervous and fragile to deal with life, is really hiding.  Randolph buries himself in his "work" in the hotel so as not to take on a parental role.  Philip tries to pretend nothing has changed between himself and Dawn.  (Various family members who should be aware of this are not, allowing the problem to continue.)  Only Lillian (Grandmother Cutler) has backbone.  At one point a supporting character remarks that it's strange that Lillian isn't more fond of Dawn, since "you're the grandchild she would want the most."  The reason why is revealed in the end, and explains the reactions of the various family members to Dawn, as well as setting the stage for the sequel.  

I was also not fond of the lack of transition from Dawn and Philip as a couple, to Dawn and Philip as siblings.  As I mentioned above, it is clear immediately that Philip is having trouble making the leap so to speak, while Dawn very quickly adjusts.  She makes several attempts to convince Philip to let go of his romantic interest in her, but is unable to persuade him.  This was the point I felt she should have sought out advice or help from someone in the family, her grandmother even.  And her transition from thinking of Jimmy as a brother, to beginning to think of him as a love interest is hurried, and I felt, not properly developed.  

All in all I did like this book, and tried to read it without letting my fifteen year old self color my thoughts.  I am going to continue my series re-read (my memory is spotty of the rest of the books) but I will admit that this series is somewhat dated, and at times, teeters on a little ridiculous.  But it is also good fun. 

For I think of us more as flowers in the attic...

I was born premature by three months and my mother taped herself reading me stories, and when she came to sit with baby me in the hospital, scared because she didn't know if I'd be healthy enough to come home soon, she'd play the tapes to me.  She read to me all the time when I was a child, and by the time I was five, I took a book in and read it to my kindergarten class. 

From there, an obsession was born. 

I love books.  I love the smell of old books, and the weight of them in my hands, as I turn the pages.  I love the thrill of deciding to buy a book from a new, unheard of author - and then the even greater thrill of loving the book.  I love re-reading old favorites, and remembering favorite passages before I come upon them.  I love that I can close my eyes and watch a place an author has described bloom, vivid in my mind.  I love letting books carry me away, and letting them change me in little ways. 

I think that's something I want to talk about some here: authors whose stories so impressed and moved me that they literally altered the way I perceived books from then on.  It's happened several times, in different genres, and at various points in my life.  And it always stuns me, coming across that amazing author, who touches your heart and shakes you up, and challenges you.

Today's is V.C. Andrews.

I read Dawn first, not Flowers in the Attic as most people probably did.  To this day, I get mixed reactions when I mention the author's name - some fascinated as I try to describe her gothic tales, some confused, but they all listen, and maybe that's the main thing. 

I had never seen a book like Dawn.  It had what I would later learn is called a keyhole cover.  A scared blonde girl peeked out of it, and as I read the prologue, I instantly knew I was reading something totally foreign and fantastic. I finished the book, and realized there was a sequel, and practically ran to Wal-Mart.  This was in...1999 and they had an entire shelf of V.C. Andrews books.  I let out a sound so high-pitched only dogs could hear it when I saw how many other books there were. 

I went through the Cutler series in no time, and moved on to the Dollanganger series.  Then My Sweet Audrina, then the Casteel series.  Then the Landry series, and the Logan family series.  I was lost to these stories.  These girls, who went through hell, and triumphed.  Who found love, despite all obstacles.  Who never, ever gave up, who struggled through life's tragedies and family secrets.  Each story spun a dark web. 

Eventually, the ghost-writer who took over writing the books after Virginia Andrew died lost his touch, at least in my mind.  I stopped reading the newer books about five or six years ago.  But I will always cherish the early books.  For someone who was used to Judy Blume and Sweet Valley High books, V.C. Andrews was another world entirely.  I am sure my 25 year old self would balk at the books if I re-read them, would probably consider them an affront to feminism.  Maybe I haven't re-read them in so long because I want to keep my memories of them intact.  I roleplay several VCA characters, one of who I have made so entirely my own that I know I couldn't re-read the ghost-written VCA novels he was in. 

Regardless, I will always smile when I think of the adventures I had reading V.C. Andrews novels, and when I think of my favorites: Web of Dreams.  Flowers in the Attic.  My Sweet Audrina.  Dawn.  I started to grow as a writer and as a reader thinks to her genre-challenging stories, to push myself in my own writing.  And later, I met my best friend through a V.C. Andrews roleplay. 

And I remembered to always, always dream.

It is so appropriate to color hope yellow, like that sun we seldom saw.  And as I begin to copy from the old memorandum journals that I kept for so long, a title comes as if inspired.  Open the Window and Stand in the Sunshine.  Yet, I hesitate to name our story that.  For I think of us more as flowers in the attic.